Live at The Bent Horseshoe

by Andrew London Trio

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    Eleven tracks culled from a live recording made November 2013 at the (now sadly closed) Bent Horseshoe Cafe, Tokomaru, New Zealand. Andrew London (guitar), Kirsten London (bass) and Nils Olsen (sax, clarinet and flute) All songs by Andrew London except McCartney's 'For No-one' and the jazz standard 'C'est si Bon'.

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of A Live Concert, Standard Deviations, Middle Class White Boy Blues, Ladies a Plate, Let's Take Offence!, So Many Tracks, Let's Have Friends Around For Dinner, and Live at The Bent Horseshoe. , and , .

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1.
Come in, get a drink, take a seat at your table try not to make too much noise & sit still if you're able I'm sure we're gonna all get on fine woulda been nice if you'd a made it on time I don't mean to bite, I'll be feeling all right if I could just get the top off this wine Don't laugh, don't cough, only sneeze if you gotta There'll be time to applaud at the end and I know that you'll wanna and if you really got to go to the john try not to flush till I finish this song, have fun if it kills you, enjoy yourself or get out You know I don't come here just for your amusement you should be grateful we could be bothered at all We could easily go some place else you’d all be sat here by yourselfs Be glad that we’re here let me make it quite clear It’s all for your cultural health You’re there, I’m here, I’m the artist remember I don’t care what you want, gonna play what I think you should hear and I don’t wanna hear your requests just remember, I know what’s best Have fun if it kills you, enjoy yourself or get out. you know, I don’t come here, just for your amusement I played with some real big names honey don't you forget If I'd a just had a little more luck but my slow-moving agent fell under a truck I know what you’re thinking, I do too much drinking well buddy, I don’t give a stuff Come in, get a drink, take a seat at your table try not to make too much noise & sit still if you're able It’s nice we could be here for you just remember, whatever you do Have fun if it kills you, enjoy yourself or get out, Only gonna tell you once, Have fun if it kills you, enjoy yourself or get out, you don’t know how lucky you are, Have fun if it kills you, enjoy yourself or get out.
2.
So nice to see you, how you been? It's been a year or two I've heard you're doing famously at whatever it is you do me? I’m just fantastic, hey I’m really glad you asked you got this conversation back on track at last... You must have heard I got that job in the advertising game you won't believe how much I earn, but I'm still just the same Sure I go to San Francisco and the Cote d'Azure on biz and all my friends are famous or they know someone who is Let's talk about me. I'm much more interesting than you Let's talk about me. My life is fabulous it's true Let's talk about me. It's something that you all should do That's enough about me, let's talk about you What do you think about me? So nice to see you, how you been? It's been a year or two I've heard you're doing swimmingly at whatever it is you do me I'm just fantastic, well the Prozac helps a bit and it's only when I stop I realise I'm talking... Shall we talk about me?
3.
In spite of all our efforts, it's apparent now to me our romance just hasn't blossomed like it should despite a dozen dates and dinners disillusionment decrees that our directions deviate, and we've divergent destinies And so it falls to me I guess to do the decent thing before we're inextricably entwined I hope you'll soon get over it, I'd like to still be friends with benefits, perhaps, if you're inclined..... Should I dump you somewhere private or in a neutral public place. etiquette says gentlemen and Catholics, should always do it face to face should I opt for somewhere open, shunning small cafes and bars could be an awkward silence after, should we maybe take two cars? Should I take you to a restaurant, will you react with some reserve I'll try and get the whole thing over, just before the mains are served I understand you'll be downhearted, and your feelings may be hurt such a shame to let a tantrum, ruin both of our dessert could I unfriend you on Facebook, send a text in lower case or an email to your office, with a little smiley face... no there's just no way around it....it's a job that must be done can we meet at 12 tomorrow - you'll be back at work by one..... Should I take you to a sad movie, betray my sensitivity so then you'd be upset already, but not directly cos of me should I dump you somewhere private, or in a neutral public place oh there's a message on my cellphone - well I’d have done it face to face.
4.
Hello, here's your key. You're early - Oh well so you come from Wellington, that right? yeah thought so - I can tell It looks as if there's three of you, your agent should have said cos I only got this unit left - yeah there's just the double bed. You want some milk? blue or green? we give you that for free but the heater's on a timer, it goes off at half past three my wife & I live right next door so if you have to, ring the bell it's all part of the service at this concrete block motel CH I been here nearly twenty years and seen the likes of you you think attending to your needs is all I've got to do I think it's only fair that I should share my private Hell the welcome mat is waiting at this concrete...concrete block motel. Now if you want to do some cooking, can you pull the blinds away We had someone splash curry on them only yesterday and check out time's at 10.00 a.m. so when you're leaving, don't be slow there's no-one booked till August but we got our rules you know? Yes of course we got the internet, it's ten bucks for an hour we got that wireless broadway thing and it takes a lotta power but if you climb up on the fridge you get the signal really well it's all part of the service at this concrete block motel Now of course there is no smoking, but it is all right to drink and the shower works OK although the pressure's on the blink so she tends to dribble out rather slow, and of course the nozzle doesn't fit so if you want to actually get wet you gotta move around a bit Hold on there is another room, how could I be so dumb It used to belong to a chap called Bates , he lived there with his Mum I think it's reasonably clean, but we'll only charge you half The shower curtain's missing and there's some stains around the bath
5.
04:30
Wake Up baby it’s a quarter to eleven I know you only got to bed at seven it’s true what they say, that a woman’s work is never done I don’t like to wake you but the baby’s getting smelly you know I’d do it for you but the rugby’s on the telly but after that you can take it easy for the rest of the day The dishes need doing and the cat’s thrown up in the corner I wouldn’t mind a cuppa if you’re coming through the kitchen again oh by the way I could use a little lunch if you think you could be bothered just a little something, don’t you go to any trouble but after that you can take it easy for the rest of the day Wasn’t that funny last night when the car broke down on the way home My back was playing up again, you had to change the tyre in the rain There’s a little bit of cleaning up to do around the shower I’ve got to watch the All Blacks for at least another hour God I’ll be glad when the rugby season is over So I don’t mind if you rest a little longer shift that piano when you feel a little stronger and after that you can take it easy for the rest of the day and maybe put your feet up after that you can take it easy for the rest of the day
6.
03:53
Good evening Sir I’m sorry, but it’s difficult to chat while I’m singing and I’m playing this guitar so I’m already multi-tasking and in asking me to join in conversation really is a bridge too far If you’ll just wait until we’re finished I can give my full attention to the crisis that so obviously preys upon your deeply troubled mind, or so your wild gesticulations and distorted facial grimaces imply Well all right I have a moment can you tell me what it is that on my advice your happiness depends from your slightly awkward gait and your inebriated state should one surmise you need immediate directions to the mens’? Oh I see that’s not the problem just you’d like to let us know you think the repertoire we’re playing’s not quite right I’m surprised that you can offer such a wry and perspicacious observation given how much Lion Red you’ve had tonight. I understand you like Metallica and AC/DC too and it’s so nice you feel obliged to come and share this point of view but I’m afraid we’re not that kind of band, we’re playing this, you see as requested by the bride and groom whose generosity you are strip mining while opining that their choice of music suck well I’ve only got two words for you and one of them is ‘off’ Can I ask you were you happy with the catering tonight did you complain about the entree, was the steak done how you like? Did you offer some suggestions to the barman? Really? No? If you’d prefer a dryer Martinborough Pinot he should know So you agree if would be rude and inappropriate to whine about the couple’s choice of venue, and the menu, and the wine yet you think it’s quite OK to come and slag the music off as you stagger round and gorge like some aristocratic toff on all the beer that you can guzzle and the wine that you can quaff I’ve only got two words for you and one of them is ‘off’
7.
03:53
Johnny was a wild one, got sent down seven years hard in Sydney Town Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay Elizabeth cried on the dock , says he, 'You're a good girl, Lizzie, don't you wait for me' Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay Johnny was a thief, he was quicker than some got caught with a bottle of the captain's rum and the blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay and the blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay Judge said 'I can turn a hard man around you can do your time out in Kingston Town Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay Johnny said ' well you can cut a chain for me,  but I'll curse your eyes till the day that I'm free Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay Johnny took a hundred till the blood ran black and the chaplain said 'That's a dead man's back' blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay and the blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay Jackie said 'Now Brother come along with me, gonna kill me a copper been a worryin' me Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay Johnny said 'well Jack I been a thinkin' just the same and they got three more before the soldiers came Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay The Commandant said 'You're gonna hang this morn, and England's sorry that you ever been born blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay and the blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay Johnny was a wild one, got sent down he never did a year in Kingston Town Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay Elizabeth cried on the day she read He was thrown in a hole, not a prayer was said Tura-lura-lura-luralie-ay And on the Murderers' Mound you can hear his plea: 'You're a good girl Lizzie don't you wait for me' blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay and the blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay and the blood runs down to the sand on Emily Bay
8.
Don't be sorry, don't be blue I've got to go but I'll be true Don't You know our love is much too strong don't be lonely, don't be sad you know I've got it just as bad don't ever say you'll leave me from now on Don't be telling me you don't know this was meant to be it was written in the bright stars all along so don't be sorry, don't be blue cos I'm on my way back home to you don't ever say you'll leave me from now on
9.
03:14
10.
02:28
11.
You got a minute or two to get through to me cos I start to wander, maybe scratch my knee start looking round at girls and shops and from that point on you got a minute tops May as well just talk to the hand I got a short attention span Baby there’s something that you gotta say better put up a sign make me look your way cover yourself in chocolate sauce do a highland fling with a talking horse get a microphone or a marching band I got a short attention span You won’t get a long conversation with me my attention wanders, is it quarter to three? I gotta be somewhere, prob’ly get there late baby I just can’t concentrate so and if you wanna get through to me better set off something like Apollo Three get me a drink get me something to eat go get yourself a part on Shortland Street tell me quick, I’m a typical man I got a short attention span.

about

Although sadly now closed, the Bent Horseshoe Cafe was an iconic Kiwi music venue nestled in the foothills of New Zealand's central North Island Tararua mountain range. Seating a maximum of around 60 people, audiences were encouraged to be respectful and attentive as they were treated to intimate shows by mostly acoustic musicians from all around the World. Jazz, blues, country, folk and similar genres were represented. This album was culled from a two hour show performed by The Andrew London Trio in late 2013. see www.andrewlondon.co.nz

credits

released August 11, 2015

Recording, mixing and mastering: Paddi Addison
Cover Design: Anje Glindemann
Photography: Jeremy Fleming

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Andrew London New Zealand

New Zealand singer/songwriter of mainly (but not exclusively) satirical original songs in a mainly (but not exclusively) 1940s swing genre.

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